Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Filling That Hiatus: The Sequel

A slow political day, which suits me just fine. Senator Obama has gone to Hawaii to visit his ailing Grandmother, which is commendable-I hope that she feels better soon. His is not the hiatus I’m posting about; this is all JBiden, I mean Senator Jim…look! He even has ME making mistakes!
Joltin’ Joe Biden, Washington’s straight from the lip, watch him trip, making sweat drip quip machine.
He’s been taken out of service, even though every moment counts between now and Election Day.
His most recent off-script brilliant thought: “Mark my words,” the Democratic vice presidential nominee warned at the second of his two Seattle fundraisers Sunday. “It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking. We’re about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember I said it standing here if you don’t remember anything else I said. Watch, we’re gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy. I can give you at least four or five scenarios from where it might originate,” Biden said to Emerald City supporters, mentioning the Middle East and Russia as possibilities. “And he’s gonna need help. And the kind of help he’s gonna need is, he’s gonna need you - not financially to help him - we’re gonna need you to use your influence, your influence within the community, to stand with him. Because it’s not gonna be apparent initially, it’s not gonna be apparent that we’re right.”

Joe Biden seems to think that a President Obama would be up to the challenge. But this causes each of us to ask ourselves: “Do I think Obama would do well in such a crisis?” My answer: NO. I think he’d fold like a pup tent. He’d be another Carter floundering in a canoe.
Joe’s charming encounter with words was most unfortunate in calling up the memory of John Kennedy meeting his crisis.
Um…Joe? Barack Obama does not measure up well when compared with John Kennedy.
Kennedy, with his military background, strong on offense military, facing down the Russians over Cuba, confronting the Communists in Vietnam/Southeast Asia…John Kennedy would be kicked out of today’s Democrat Party.
But this is all background, to show why Joe Biden has been given a ‘time out’.
That ‘time out’, that hiatus must be filled. Joe’s an energetic guy-he needs to take action.
So here is my list of things Grandmaster Gaffe can do in the interim:
Get a haircut. (Ha ha ha ah ha!)
Practice his elocution: “Ain’t gonna say ain’t no more, gonna say isn’t or aren’t. Gonna gonna gonna.”
Peruse ‘The Wit and Wisdom of Winston Churchill’ for jokes he can ‘borrow’.
Go see a double feature of Max Payne and Beverly Hills Chihuahua. That little guy is nutz!
See if he can find Dick Cheney’s “Undisclosed Location”.
Find Waldo with Googlemaps.
More elocution: “President John McCain…Vice President Sarah Palin.”

You might (I doubt) be wondering about the title of this post. I pulled a Joe Biden. I ‘borrowed’ the title from one of Robert Benchley’s short humor pieces, which had to do with what to do when dining at a party alone, when guests on both sides of you are busy in other conversations. Good stuff.

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